


Taking A Chance

by bjfic_archivist



Category: Queer as Folk (US)
Genre: Alternate Universe, Canon
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2004-07-11
Updated: 2004-08-02
Packaged: 2018-12-27 02:18:06
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 6
Words: 12,213
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12071613
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/bjfic_archivist/pseuds/bjfic_archivist
Summary: This is Justin's freshman year at Penn State. He could be best described as a shy, insecure, anti-social type person. He's always been that way. However, that's not who he wants to be. Will Justin take a chance now that he's in college and break free from his shy self? Maybe with the help of a fellow classmate he will be able to loosen up. Feedback is much appreciated.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Note from IrishCaelan, the archivist: this story was originally archived at [The Brian/Justin Fanfiction Archive](http://fanlore.org/wiki/Brian_Justin_Fanfiction_Archive). To preserve the archive, I began importing its works to the AO3 as an Open Doors-approved project in September 2017. I posted announcements, but may not have reached everyone. If you are (or know) this creator, please contact me using the e-mail address on [The Brian/Justin Fanfiction Archive collection profile](http://archiveofourown.org/collections/bjfic/profile).

Justin woke up at around 8:30 in the morning. He yawned and turned over on his back. Looked down and saw that he was sporting his regular morning woody. His hand crept underneath the sheets and he started to massage and stroke his cock. After a few minutes, he came into his hand. He grabbed a tissue from his nightstand and proceeded to wipe himself.

Justin got out of bed and headed to the bathroom to brush his teeth. After brushing his pearly whites, he stepped under the hot spray of the shower and began to wash himself. He closed his eyes and his mind wandered off thinking of how his day might turn out. This was Justin’s freshman year at Penn State. To be exact, this was his first day of classes and he was a bit nervous. Justin wasn’t a very social person. In fact, his father always described him as being “quite anti-social.” Had never been a good people person. He had always been a shy boy and his best friend was an imaginary friend named ‘Ralph.’ Ralph had always been there for him as a little boy. Had never let him down. But as Justin got older, he decided it would be best to let Ralph go. 

Now, Justin was still a rather insecure young man who was afraid of rejection and letting anyone get too close to him. So afraid of experiencing anything new that he hadn’t even had a boyfriend before. Hadn’t even been kissed before. But he wanted a boyfriend, a relationship. He would dream about it. Dream about kissing a beautiful boy his age and wrapping his arms around him. Dream about having wild, passionate sex. Lived vicariously through his fantasies. Fantasizing was about the most fun he ever had. 

Having realized he had spent over twenty minutes in the shower, he turned the faucet off and stepped out. Began to dry his pale, smooth skin and wrapped the towel around his waist. Looked in the mirror and studied himself. Justin thought he was an okay looking guy. Average looking at best. What Justin didn’t know was that he was a beautiful young man. “Don’t fuck this up” he said to himself in the mirror. He wanted his freshman year to go well yet at the same time he wasn’t too sure he would be able to experience life to the fullest if he continued to play it safe and not take any chances. 

He went through his closet that was very well organized by the way and pulled out a baby blue long sleeve shirt and dark blue jeans from ‘Old Navy', which just so happen to accentuate his bubble butt. Justin knew he had a great ass. That was one of the things he had no doubts about. He threw on the shirt and slipped the jeans over his hips. Looked in the mirror and mentally approved his ensemble. He slung his messenger bag over his shoulder and headed for his first class of the day. 

Justin walked through the Monroe Center in hopes of not getting lost. He was intent on arriving to his Creative Writing class on time. There is nothing more embarrassing than getting to class after the bell has rung and having all eyes on you. As Justin was attempting to make his way towards the classroom, he noticed the countless number of people that surrounded the campus. It felt like a mini version of New York City to him. There must have been hundreds of students walking to and from classes here on campus. He was actually getting a bit nervous being around so many people. He hated crowds and wondered why he chose to attend such a big school. Oh yeah that’s right. It was his father’s decision. His dad wanted him to achieve an MBA because no son of his was going to do foolish things like dabble in writing and art courses. However, Justin was thrilled to discover that the Creative Writing course he was taking would fulfill an English requirement. Therefore, there was no room for his father to be angry. Justin finally reached his destination with the guidance of the campus map he had picked up after first arriving to campus. He knew it would come in handy. He stared at the door. The number 223 was emblazoned on the front. He slowly turned the knob and once inside he closed the door as quietly as he could.   
~~~~~~

Justin’s POV 

Oh this is awful, just awful. Everyone here is staring at me. My day has barely started and it already sucks. All eyes are trained on me. I should just stay calm. They’re people just like me. Okay maybe not just like me. Eyes on me. Shit I must be blushing. Feel the blood rushing to my head. 

“Well hello there. And what may I ask is your name?” The professor looked like he wanted to shoot daggers at me with his eyes. 

“Um my name is…Justin…Justin Taylor.” 

“Well do you mind telling me why you are late to my class? We’re all just dying to know. And you might as tell us a little bit about yourself since you’re already standing.” 

I turn to face the class and each and every one of them is looking right at me. How fucking embarrassing is that?? I decide that I will keep my eyes to the floor otherwise I won’t get through this introduction in one piece. I am blushing from all this attention. Can feel the heat radiating off my face. 

“ I um I guess I got a little lost. Uh well my name is Justin Taylor. And I’m 18 years old. I… I like to write so that’s why I chose this class and I guess that’s it.” 

“Well I am sure that’s not just it Mr. Taylor. I’m sure you are much more than simply an 18 year old with a desire to write. Look around the class here. It’s filled with 18 year olds who like to write. All right there is an empty seat near the back of the room. Go on your way so that we can continue class.” 

Fuck Fuck Fuck! What an asshole. Why did he have to be such a jerk to me? Yeah I was like 5 minutes late. So what? He didn’t have to embarrass me like that. Well, I guess it’s just a sign that this will be a bad year for me. I guess a small part of me was kind of hoping that maybe things would look up. But that was silly of me to think that. 

I am heading for the empty seat when my eyes come upon the most gorgeous creature I have ever seen. He looks at me and grins. God he is beautiful. Still smiling at me. I blush and take my seat, which just so happens to be right next to this beauty. I try and stare ahead attempting to focus my eyes on my professor and what he is saying but I really want to get a closer look of this hot guy. I look to the left of me and am mesmerized by what I see. He has rich auburn hair that looks a bit messy like bed head. But that’s what makes it sexy as hell. And he has this long, lean body. In my mind I am mentally undressing him although chances are he’s straight. That would be my luck. Even if he were gay, he wouldn’t be into me. They never are. 

“Like what you see?” 

Oh shit he knows I was looking at him. Um shit what do I do? Man, his voice is sexy and raw. 

“Um I’m sorry” I reply in a shy voice. 

I’m not really sorry for having studied this beautiful guy. Who could blame me for looking? I better be careful though. He could kick my ass if he wanted to I’m sure. I decide it would be best if I simply look straight ahead and pay attention to Professor Stevens. Well more like Professor Dickhead. That suits him better. 

“No problem. My name’s Brian Kinney by the way. And we’ve already established that your name is Justin. Nice to meet you.” 

“Yeah same here.” He’s looking into my eyes and I can feel myself start to blush. Again. One of the curses of having such fair skin. Well and the fact that I manage to get nervous oh so easily. We are staring at one another when all of a sudden the professor’s voice brings me out of this high I’m experiencing. 

“Now I would like each of you to find a partner and sit together. You can rearrange your chairs if needed. I want you to get to know one another. Whoever you pair off with is going to be your writing partner. What that means is that you are going to work on a few future writing assignments together. Now this isn’t simply a social hour. I’d like you to ask each other some questions that relate to writing such as: Why did you decide to enroll in this class? What are you hoping to achieve? Now get cracking.” 

Brian rearranges his chair and desk so that it’s connected to mine. I swallow hard just watching his gorgeous body move. Oh damn it’s only a matter of time before I get a hard on simply from being in the presence of this creature. 

“So Justin. What’s your story?” 

“Um what do you mean exactly?” 

“What I mean is it’s obvious that you are a gay boy because you were so obviously checking me out. But hey, I can’t blame you. I’m sure when class is over you’ll head to the bathroom and jerk off thinking of me.” 

OMIGOD did he just say what I think he said? He must be able to read my mind because of course that’s what I was thinking. But how dare him to be so forthright and cocky. He must see the look of shock on my face because I can see his lips start to move. 

“Hey don’t worry. I’m gay too.”

“Really?” I can feel myself smiling at his admission. 

“Yeah didn’t you notice the way I was checking you out while you were checking me out?” 

A look of confusion crosses my face. I’m nothing special. I’m just me. I’m okay looking but this guy is unbelievably sexy and hot and self-confident. I can tell. What would he want with me? We should focus here on getting to know more about why we our taking this class anyhow. 

“So what made you decide to take this writing course?” 

“Well I really do like to write. For the longest while I would keep these journals and record my everyday thoughts. But the real reason I took this class was in the hope of meeting a hot blond boy such as yourself.” 

I look down at the desk as if I’m studying it. I know he must be looking right at me seeing the color rise to my cheeks. I feel my heart start to race and I feel a bit light headed. My mouth is dry and I’m so confused. This isn’t right. I don’t know why this guy…Brian is telling me lies. It’s like he’s trying to play a joke on me. I can feel the sadness taking over inside of me. Just hope it doesn’t register on my face. Don’t want him to see that he’s having an affect on me. 

“Wow. You really don’t know how beautiful you are. That’s it isn’t it. Well you are.”

He’s so genuine with his words. He sounds so sincere and when I look into his eyes I feel like he’s speaking the truth.

“It’s just that no one has ever told me I’m beautiful before. You’re the first.”


	2. Taking A Chance

Brian’s POV 

Is it actually possible that no one has ever told this kid just hot he is? Wow that’s pretty fucked up when you think about it. He’s a walking wet dream. Anyone who thinks different is..well..let’s just say they may need to have their eyes examined. 

Can’t help but laugh. Find this amusing. Well it’s amusing to me at least. Maybe I have a strange sense of humor. Now he’s looking at me with a nervous expression wondering what in the hell is so funny. He’s got this adorable face and don’t even get me started on those lips. Pink, perfect…I am so fucked. Actually..I’ll be the one doing the fucking. 

“Are you fucking shittin’ me? Long golden locks, big blue eyes, and a perfect smile…I could go on and on. But I’ll save that for another time. You’re actually telling me that no one ever compliments you on your looks?” 

“Well no…I mean…not that I can remember…no,” Justin responds truthfully. He can’t help the smile that forms on his lips soaking in the nice things Brian’s telling him. 

“Yeah I’m sorry but that’s just fucked. Not even one of your old boyfriend’s perhaps?” 

I ask because this is my way to get some dirt on this shy gorgeous boy. His cheeks bloom with color. Making Justin blush is a lot of fun. Could become my new hobby. Happen to find it endearing truth be told. Makes him look about twelve years old..

“Um I’ve never had a…boyfriend. I know it sounds lame,” Justin shrugs his shoulders in an attempt to show that it’s no big deal. 

“How is that even possible?” This kid continues to surprise me. Hmm…but then I realize there is so much that I could teach him. My guess is Justin’s a virgin. Can tell by the way he blushes so easily. Not only that, but I’ll bet he’s never even been kissed before. I feel a little bad for him yet at the same time completely turned on. I could show him how to become the best homosexual he could possibly be. 

“I don’t know. No one’s exactly volunteered to go out with me. Not like I have guys lining up dying to ask me out or anything,” Justin replies with a hint of sadness in his voice. 

“Guys can be idiots Justin. Someone would have to be crazy not to go out with you. You may not believe me but it’s the truth. Hell, maybe I’ll even be able to convince you.” Give him my trademark Kinney smile. All I want is to bend Justin over a desk, rip his jeans off, and fuck the shit out of him. That would certainly help him get over the fear of public attention he seems to have. But then again, it could also end up scarring him for the rest of his life. The boy is just soooo shy. My plan is to sweet talk this boy. Then he’ll be a sure thing. 

“Uh I um…have to use the bathroom, k? I’ll be back,” Justin gets up from his seat making sure to conceal his growing bulge with the agenda planner he bought. This action didn’t go unnoticed by Brian. 

I watch Justin’s ass as he proceeds to exit the classroom. Wonder if following him to the bathroom is a wise idea. The kid might stroke out if I dragged him into a stall and began to have my way with him. Love to see the look on his face. But on the other hand, perhaps he’s waiting for me to take care of his little problem. Something tells me he’s not so little though. After tapping my fingers on my desk for a few seconds, I decide to go for it. Why not give the kid a thrill? Have a feeling he hasn’t had too much excitement in his life.   
~~~~~~~~~~~

Justin’s crouched over the sink washing his hands as I make my way over to him, I am able to study his perfect ass. Mmm…it’s like a work of art. I quietly walk over to him. Don’t want him to see or hear me quite yet. Wrap my arms around his waist and press my body against his. Perfectly aware that anyone could walk in on us. Don’t care though. My erection is digging into his ass. Fuck…he feels so amazing. Feel him tense and he begins to struggle out of my arms. But then Justin looks up in the mirror and sees my reflection. At first his eyes go wide. Then slowly relaxes into my body. Feels more like he’s melting. Have a feeling he was craving this human contact. 

I run my hand through his hair, which feels like silk and tell him to look in the mirror. Want him to see himself, see his beauty. He listens to my command and continues to stare at his reflection. I place my lips against his ear and silently tell him how hot he is. He grins. And it’s amazing. What is it about this boy? Something inside of me feels compelled to tell him how beautiful he is. He should know. Maybe the words will begin to soon register and he’ll be able to gain a bit of self-esteem along the way. Must be part of the reason as to why he’s so incredibly insecure and timid. Or not. Don’t know much about this kid. Wouldn’t mind if knew more. Hmmm...

I unwrap my arms from around his tiny little waist and grab him by the collar of his shirt and drag him into one of the stalls. This was the plan after all. Shut the door and push him against the wall. He looks at me with what could best be described as shock and opens his mouth. No words are coming out though. That’s just as well. Now I’ve managed to make him speechless on top of the blushing. Man, I’m good. 

“I want you to touch me Justin.” You should see his face. His mouth is hanging open and I wonder what that mouth would feel like wrapped around my cock. He does have amazing lips after all. It’s best to save that lesson for another time though. 

“You want me to touch your…coc...cock?” Justin asks. He wants to more than anything but…

“Yep. Assuming of course you’re up to the challenge that is. Go on. Touch it. See how hard you’ve made me.” He slowly moves his hand toward my rock hard erection and finally…we have contact. He smiles and starts rubbing it. I think I could come just like this. But then he quickly removes his hand and I groan at the loss. 

“I…I’m sorry. I can’t do this,” Justin says and rushes out of the restroom with the wind beneath his feet. 

What the fuck just happened? One minute I’m about to get my rocks off and then he storms out. Damn. Guess I’ll have to take care of this myself. No point in wasting a perfectly good erection. Maybe I’d run after Justin if I didn’t have such a massive boner. It’s just a matter of time before he’s mine. He’s definitely going to pay for leaving me in such a state of arousal. Fuck.


	3. Taking A Chance

Justin’s POV 

 

Lying in bed thinking of Brian with my eyes closed. Before meeting him I’d usually fantasize about Colin Farrell or Jude Law. No harm in that. After our encounter the other day, I came back here and stripped. Got under the covers and grew harder by the second with the image of him in my mind. Came so hard imagining all the naughty sexual acts he could perform on me and vice versa. Imagined my mouth taking in all of Brian’s cock, tasting his cum as it slid down my throat. His dick filling up my ass, stretching, filling up the space inside me. Popping my cherry. He could be my first everything if I wanted. Might sound silly since we met the other day but it’s what I want, what I need. 

He’s beautiful, too beautiful. I’d be lucky, very lucky to be with him. Gawd, the man told me I was beautiful. Think of him as a man and not a boy. He’s too sexy for his age. He’s too much of everything I wish I could be. Admire his confidence, the way he seems so sure of himself. Positive he’s never once doubted himself. Brian could be a Calvin Klein underwear model if he wanted. Thought maybe he was one when we first met. The type of person who I’m sure looks even better with his clothes off. 

Get out of bed and grab a can of coke from my miniature refrigerator. Open it and take a long sip and feel it slide down my throat. Refreshing. Then I hear a knock, knock, knock. 

Walk over to my door and turn the handle, not at all prepared for who’s standing right in front of me. It’s Brian, the man with the hazel eyes and the cherry red lips. I swallow hard and nervously run a finger through my hair. 

“Umm what are you doing here?” He must see the look of shock written across my face. 

“Don’t worry. I’m not a stalker or anything, if that’s what you’re thinking. Your RA’s Emmett Honeycutt right?” 

“Yeah,” I say with a slight smile. 

“Well I’m a friend of his. We took Bio together last year. We were talking and he mentioned there was a hot blond guy who lived on his floor and I thought it had to be you. And when he said your name, then I knew it was.” 

“Oh…yeah well Emmett’s nice. He dragged me to breakfast yesterday,” I say to him. Emmett is a character. Definitely flamboyant…but I like him. He’s a sweet guy. 

“Are you going to invite me in…or am I going to have to stand here like an idiot all night?” Brian asks while lightly chuckling. He looks like sex. Wearing a black wife beater that shows off his lightly sculpted tan arms. Look down and he has on acid washed jeans that ride low on his waist. Yeah…the man is utterly sex on legs. 

“Oh well yeah sure. Yeah come in.” I am anxious as hell but I decide that turning him away might mean I’ll never get a chance to talk to him…ever again because he’ll…hate me. He walks passed me and I breathe in the scent of cigarettes and alcohol. 

I shut the door and he’s already in my room skulking around checking out my place. My room’s clean. The walls are white and empty. Maybe I should buy a couple posters to make this place look more like a home. Right now it’s too sterile. 

He walks toward me and reaches into his pocket. Brings his hand back out and offers me a candy bar. It’s a ‘Snickers.’ Smile to myself. That’s always been my favorite chocolate. Love chocolate. Tastes like sex to me. Sometimes I get horny while eating it. Decided a long time ago that chocolate is a turn-on of mine. After all, many people claim it’s better than sex. I of course have nothing to compare it to since I haven’t tried out the whole sex thing. Never even been to first base. Curious if he can tell I’m inexperienced. 

“Thanks. That was…sweet of you Brian,” I say hoping maybe if I thank him and flash a smile, he’ll forget about the other day…when I ran away from him…while he was so fucking hard. Shit. 

“Anything for you Sunshine,” Brian says and flops down on my bed. Guh. 

“You have a nice bed,” he says. “It’s roomy. And it’s hard, the mattress that is.” 

“Yeah…well it’s nice to see you Brian. I mean…I guess I’m surprised you came here. Yeah…guess I wasn’t expecting this.” I look down at my feet and slightly blush. 

“Ah but it was a nice surprise right? I’m sure you’ve been thinking of me huh? You know, you were a bad boy leaving me in the bathroom like that. Rock hard and I had to take care of it all by my widdle self. Wish it had been you jerking me off instead,” Brian says and begins to unzip his boots. 

I’m standing in front of him and my eyes wander down to his feet. Those are nice boots. Wonder where he bought them. But why is he…

“Uh…why are you taking your shoes off?” I…feel like I’m about to freak out. He’s trying to seduce me again isn’t he? 

“Just trying to get comfortable here. Don’t you want to hang out for a while? We could watch some television if you wanted.” Brian waits for me to say something…anything. 

“Oh ok. Yeah I haven’t watched anything since moving in…so lemme’ just plug it in.” Oh. That sounded a bit sexual I decide. He looks at me with his eyebrow arched. And I of course blush…because that’s what I do. Always do. Once read about this procedure that could prevent one from ever blushing again. Sounded interesting. It’s not a common procedure though and I’m sure it costs money…maybe not worth it.

“You’re cute when you blush, Taylor.” He says genuinely to me. Gets comfortable on my bed like he owns it. Hah, that’s interesting. 

That makes me blush even more. When someone mentions my tendency to blush…well…then my face gets even redder than before. Blushing is such a girly thing to do anyway. 

Walk over to my television set and crouch down on the carpet sitting on my haunches. While plugging the cord into the outlet, I have a feeling Brian’s staring at my ass. I know I have a hot ass and… he’s gay…which means he can appreciate a nice ass when he sees one. 

“You’re not looking at my ass are you?” I look over my shoulder and give him a shy smile. He gives me a wicked grin and wiggles his eyebrows. 

“Hmm yes I was. The view was just too…perfect. You know you’ve got a hot ass don’t you?” 

“Yeah I know.” Turn the TV on and make my way over to my bed remote control in hand… where the sexiest man is making himself right at home. Purse my lips together trying to hold in the breath I want to release. Take in his long lean body. His feet are even sexy. So flawless this creature is. Eyes travel up those long legs and up to his stomach…then quickly realize that I’m staring…and he knows it too. Shake my head and try to regain focus. 

“Come sit down Justin. Promise I won’t bite unless of course you want me too.” His voice is low and sexy. 

“I’m not afraid of you,” I lie making myself comfortable on the bed leaving quite a bit of space between Brian and I. Goosebumps are forming on my skin. 

“Is that why you’re lying against the edge of the bed?” Shit…busted…of course I’m scared of him…of his beauty…the way he talks…of it all…don’t want him to know that. But he does. He sees me. At least I think he does. 

Scoot a little closer and look up at him. Suddenly the idea of watching TV doesn’t sound so appealing. Not what I really want to do anyway. Not about to make a move though. A shy boy such as myself would never dare. A guy like Brian wouldn’t expect me to act like that. His eyes darken with what appears to be lust. He wants me, wants to fuck me. I did make him hard after all…the other day. 

He takes my hand and places it on his smooth cheek. Suddenly his fingers slowly creep up my arm. Tickles my skin. Feels good though. I close my eyes and revel in this moment. 

“You’re so soft Justin.” He says as his long thin fingers make their way up to my hair slowly petting the blond strands. 

Rubs his nose up against the top of my head and inhales my scent. “And you smell good too. What brand of shampoo do you use anyway?” He giggles into my hair and that makes me giggle too. “Kiehl’s…it has coconut in it.” 

“Hmm you smell like a Pina Colada. I could drink you up. Hmm…that’s an idea isn’t it? Well I’ve always thought that gay boys should always have an extensive collection of hair care products.” He gives me a lazy grin. 

I smile. “Yeah I happen to agree.” And I do. My head is starting to feel dizzy. His body’s so close to mine. 

He takes my hand in his and suddenly it feels as if we’re boyfriends, which sounds silly. But I don’t really care. Treasure this second and the next. Happy that he’s here with me. He’s being awfully sweet and it’s strange because the other day he was so…sexual with me. But now…he’s different. Still sexual, but he’s sweet and friendly. Wonder if this is a real side of him or if he’s playing a game. 

“You know it’s weird. You seem relaxed with me, not as nervous. When we first met you seemed pretty shy and now…you’re a lot calmer. What changed?” That’s a good question because I don’t really have an answer. Maybe it’s because…I’m sick of being so nervous all the time…I don’t want to be…sometimes there are days where I feel in control…like I’m able to be who I want to be. It gets tiresome worrying about everything…doubting myself. Truth is being in large groups freaks the shit out of me…but one on one is nice. This is what I crave but never get. 

“I feel safe with you, like I can trust you. You just make me feel good.” And it’s the truth plain and simple. 

His fingers squeeze mine and it feels warm, a bit sticky because my hand is sweating a bit. Not used to this kind of contact. I like it though. It’s new. 

He looks at me and something has changed…now he’s the one who looks a bit nervous. Perhaps I said too much too soon. Tonight I’m just feeling brave for some reason. I just need this. Haven’t ever felt so close to anyone before and we’re only holding hands. 

But then his lips start to curl upward and he lets go of my hand. I frown but then he quickly gets on top of me. Straddling my waist. Oh god…his weight on me is just right…feels so good. I bite my bottom lip and my heart rate starts to speed up…this is all too much. Don’t even know anything about Brian. Only that his last name is Kinney. Hope he’ll want more than sex. 

“I’m going to kiss you now, and you’re going to like it Justin,” Brian says, his voice husky. 

He leans down and places his lips against mine. He smiles against ‘em. I open my mouth and allow him entrance inside. His wet tongue starts exploring and I can feel the blood rushing downward. Only a matter of time before I get a full hard-on but it doesn’t matter to me. Nothing matters but this. Here and now. Close my eyes. Sticks his tongue down my throat. Now I know what a French kiss feels like. I groan. Ahh…this feels so damn good. Could kiss him for hours. He tastes like beer and smoke and I taste like coke. He breaks away and we both pant trying to get our breathing under control. His lips are swollen and wet. I touch my cheek and I’m warm. No surprise there. This was my first kiss and it was…wow. Just wow. No words. 

“Mmm…you taste good Justin,” Brian says eyes sparkling with lust. He reaches down and squeezes my growing cock through the confines of my jeans. “You’re hard Justin.” Um yeah…of course I am. I have the sexiest man on top of me. Would you expect anything less? And ohhh…his hand feels good. 

“Yeah can’t help it…you make me…hot.” Can’t believe I’m getting this far with Brian. I want more…but I know I’m not ready to go all the way. Not ready for that…no…no…no. The idea of getting fucked scares me. 

“What are you thinking about?” Brian looks at me cheeks flushed, just like mine. 

“Just wondering when I’ll wake up from this dream,” I say honestly. Tilt my head and look away suddenly in a new mood. This can’t be real. 

Brian reaches down and cups my cock. “Feel that? That’s no dream Justin. That’s my hand on your dick.” He kisses me on the nose. I can only hum. Then he unbuttons and unzips my Levi’s. “Lift your hips.” It’s more like a command. I comply. 

He slides my jeans off and I can’t help but shiver. Only wearing my tightie whities now and a t-shirt. These are the ones I wear on laundry day. Hope he doesn’t care.

“Your skin’s like porcelain,” he says before he starts nibbling on my toes. Glad I took a shower a couple hours ago. Damn that tickles. Sensitive to the touch. I quietly laugh but then he’s taking a toe and sucking on it. God he’s good at that. Feel like I could have an orgasm in my foot. Is that even possible? 

But then he stops. “Ever been rimmed before Justin?” Rimming. I’ve read about it online. Was too afraid to ever go into a bookstore and find the Gay/Lesbian section. Worried of what strangers would think. 

Now I feel like the nervous virgin who doesn’t know anything. That’d be true but I don’t want him to know that. Should I lie and say I have? Or maybe he’ll see right through me. 

“Uhh…no I haven’t.” I choke on my reply. Throat feels dry. 

“Well you have a hot ass. Want to try it out?” He looks at me with his bangs partially covering his eyes and he’s just sooo…gorgeous. And he wants to please me. I should say yes, so I nod my head and give him a small smile.

He reaches up and pulls the t-shirt up over my head and then removes my undies. And then I’m completely naked and self-conscious. He’s fully clothed and I’m completely bare, open. His eyes go up and down studying my body very closely. Hope he likes what he sees. Not so sure I even do. But then his tongue creeps out between his lips and it moves around making his mouth wet and glossy. There’s my answer. 

“You’re so beautiful Justin. And you don’t even know.” Well maybe if he were to tell me on a regular basis, I’d be convinced. Smile and my mouth parts a little waiting for his next move. 

~~~~~~~~~

Brian’s POV 

“Roll over,” I say to him. Can’t wait to eat this boy out. He’s got it all…a big cock and an amazing ass. Bet he’s tight, real tight. 

I place a pillow underneath his hips and rest my eyes upon the most perfect ass I’ve ever seen. This boy’s skin is flawless. Rest my palm on his right cheek. Soft. He’s got the right amount of fat and muscle. The perfect bubble butt. I separate his cheeks and his hips jerk a little. And then I see it, his tight little hole staring back at me. So fucking hot. I immediately attack it. Stick my tongue out and lick around the outside of his hole. Hear him moan into the pillow not wanting to be loud. He’s shy like that. Start nipping around the folds and soon he begins to loosen up the tiniest bit. Slowly enter his ass and his hips immediately buck. My grip is tight on his waist trying to keep him still. Rub circles on his pale back trying to calm him down. Mmm…he tastes so fucking good. I go even deeper and his moans intensify. He’s a quivering mess. Never felt this kind of pleasure. 

His hole contracts and releases around my tongue. Reach underneath and start stroking his erect cock. God…he’s so damn hot. He feels warm in my hand. Jerking him off faster and faster…and then he comes. 

He turns his head and looks down at me. Cheeks are a nice shade of pink and his eyes are clouded over with pure lust. “Thanks,” he says in a little voice. Lie beside him and pet his hair. I could get used to this. He’s panting and there are beads of sweat on his forehead. Close my eyes and smile. It’s late. Can’t move. Feel too good lying here. I could get used to this. Open my eyes and he’s watching me. He looks tired though. Guess my rim job wore him out. Tell him to shut his eyes and I do the same.


	4. Taking A Chance

First time writing sex here. If not hot enough, will be hotter in future chapters.

* * *

Justin’s POV 

When I wake up, the sunlight is pouring through my windows. Make a mental note to close the shades at night. Rub my eyes. Feel tired. Not quite sure how long I slept. Turn my head to find someone asleep in my bed. Fuck. What is he doing here? Shit. We kissed and he rimmed me I think. Yeah. Blush at the memory. My heart starts to flutter in my chest recalling the details of last night. Feel my lips curling upward and close my eyes for a brief second repeating everything that took place here in my bed. Mm, last night was the most fun I’ve had in a long, long while. Not sure why or how it all happened. Don’t really know why I allowed it to get so far. Never been so close to anyone before. 

The alarm beeps and the noise fucking startles me. Hope it hasn’t woken up sleeping beauty. But it has. See him stretch his long legs and raise his arms above his head. He yawns and his eyes start to squint open. He glances around probably wondering where the hell he is and finds me staring down at him. 

“Oh. Hi there,” he says. He gives me a little smile. Sexy. Even in the morning, he looks fucking gorgeous. 

I bite my bottom lip and look into those eyes searching for something, not sure what. “Um…hi.” 

He scoots his body towards mine and runs his fingers through my hair. He seems obsessed with my long blond hair. Always touching it. 

“It looks like I ended up crashing here last night. Sorry about that.” 

“Hmm, yeah. It’s okay.” I tell him it’s fine which it was. Or maybe it was at the time. Now I don’t know what I think. I…

His eyes wander down my body and he chuckles to see my morning hard-on tenting up the sheet. Shit. I’m always hard in the morning, even more so now that he’s here. 

“I’d be more than glad to help you out there,” he says as his hand creeps underneath the sheet and I watch it make its way over to my dick. He gives it a firm squeeze and begins to stroke it…but I…push his hand away and move a few inches away from his warm body. 

He frowns but I quickly supply an explanation. “I uh…got class in about ninety minutes. So, I’m gonna go take a shower.” He slowly nods his head in understanding.

“Well, do you mind if I share that shower with you? We would be conserving water.” He smiles and starts to remove his tank top thinking that my answer will be yes. 

“No…I mean…I don’t think that would be a good idea.” 

“Why not?” He scrunches his eyebrows.

“There’s not much room in there. I…it would be a tight squeeze.” I partially lie. The shower is somewhat small, but that’s not the reason I don’t want him to join me. 

“But I like tight squeezes,” he replies with an evil grin plastered on that sexy face of his. 

I turn ten shades of red at his sexual innuendo. “I…I’m a bit claustrophobic. It’d be best if I shower alone. You can take one after me, if you want.” I lie. I’m not claustrophobic. Have a hunch he knows I’m bullshitting but he won’t say anything. 

I wrap the bed sheet around my naked form and Brian gives me this weird look. He’s probably curious why I’m being modest and standoffish. Last night, I was naked with his tongue up my ass. And now, well, I’m me again. 

Walk to my bathroom and shut the door behind me. Rest my elbows on the sink and look into the mirror. “What are you doing?” I ask myself. All my life, I’m this shy and insecure person. And then one day, I meet this incredible guy who makes me feel like I’m somebody. He’s charming and sexy and sweet. And it’s what I’ve wanted all this time. But I’m so used to being alone. Sometimes that song “One is the loneliest number” will repeat in my head. I hate being alone, well most of the time anyway. At times, that’s all I want. Right now, I just wish Brian would leave and give me a little space. But there’s that part of me that wishes he would come and join me here. 

As the water cascades down my body, it begins to have a calming effect on me. Yet at the same time, I wonder how I’m going to face Brian when I come out of the bathroom. There’s something about him that makes me not want to trust him. I can’t give myself to him yet. I don’t know him well enough. But god, I want him so bad. 

Bend down to reach for the body wash and look down to see a set of arms wrapped around my chest. Didn’t hear him coming in. Brian pulls me against him and his hard cock pushes against my ass. Ah, that is…such an amazing feeling. I tilt my head back and he nibbles on the pale flesh of my neck. He bites down hard and I know that will bring a nasty bruise. I don’t care. I moan loudly. He licks at the spot and then grabs the soap and squeezes a dollop between his fingers. He starts to massage my back, my stomach, everywhere. I whimper. Feel my cock getting harder by the second. 

“You like the feel of my hands on you, Taylor?” His voice is low and seductive. 

“I…uh…god.” He reaches for my cock and strokes it nice and slow. I’m leaking pre-come. He takes his middle finger and brings it to the tip of my cock and then brings it to his lips and tastes me. He turns me around and his lips crash against mine. I close my eyes and open my mouth. He sucks on the bottom flesh of my lip, and pushes his tongue all around inside my mouth. He starts to suck on my tongue. I moan into his mouth. This feels so right. 

He wraps an arm around my waist and pulls me flush against his slippery and wet body. I groan and whimper at the feel of our cocks coming into contact with one another. He takes our cocks and strokes them in his hand. It’s so warm and hot. Never, even in my fantasies, have I imagined this. My knees start to buckle underneath me and he catches me before I fall down. 

“Hey, easy there,” he says with a slight grin. He then wraps both of his arms around my neck and looks at me, really looks at me. I blush and nervously glance down. 

“All I want is to fuck you. Right here and now. That’s what I’ve been thinking about since that first moment I saw you.” He licks around the outside of my ear and it causes me to emit a giggle. 

“I know you want me, Justin. I want to fuck you so bad.” His words send a shiver down my spine and I feel lightheaded. 

For a moment, I consider kicking him in the balls and running away. But I’ve been running away all my life. My body wants this man, and I want him. I need this more than I’ve ever wanted anything. 

“I…want you Brian. Please!” I whimper and he nods his head. 

“Where are you going?” I say as he turns his back to exit the shower. 

“Just need to get some supplies. Be right back.” He gives me a quick peck on the lips. I lean back against the shower and start panting. Fuck. I’m about to have sex. I…wow…I can’t think. 

He comes back with a condom and tells me to turn around. He kisses my shoulder and that feels sweet. He places wet, random, sloppy kisses all over my skin and I feel his hand wander down toward the crack of my ass. He pushes his finger against my hole and the water has acted as enough lubrication, so the digit is able to slip in slightly. And it doesn’t hurt too much which makes me think that it won’t be too painful when the moment of penetration takes place. He starts twisting a second finger inside scissoring me open. He presses against the wall of my anus, and soon, he touches something that sends an electrical shock throughout my entire body. 

“Ahhh fuck,” I moan out. 

“Does that feel good? That’s your prostate,” he smiles against my ear. 

I can only pant. I know I have a prostate, but I didn’t how it would feel so damn good. 

Hear him rip open the condom packet and my heart rate starts to accelerate. Now, his cock his presses against my hole. A nervous feeling takes over and my eyes go wide. My whole body starts to shake a little. 

He starts to rub soothing circles on my back. “Shhh, it’s okay Justin. We don’t have to do this.”

I crane my neck around and he must see the look of fear in my eye. “It’s just…I’m scared. I’ve never had sex before. I want to, with you. But, I’m afraid.”

He kisses me on the lips and says, “I’ll go slow okay. As for it hurting, it always hurts a little at first, but the pleasure will soon outweigh the pain.” 

His words comfort me a bit. I am not so sure fucking in the shower would be ideal though. I might slip and break my head open. Maybe we should…

“Can we do it in the bed instead?” I blurt out. 

He nods his head and we quickly towel off and run over to the bed. We both flop down on it like overly excited schoolchildren. But then, I remember that in a way, that’s what we are. 

I’m lying on my back with my knees bent and he smiles down at me while sitting on his haunches. He takes some lube and squirts a dollop between his fingers. He makes his way to my entrance and massages some of it deep inside of me. 

“Fuck. That’s cold,” I say with a shy giggle.

“Don’t worry. It’ll heat up soon enough.” He takes some more lube and coats his sheathed cock with it. 

“Alright. Rest your legs up over my shoulders.” I do what he says, but my heart feels like it’s about to jump out of my chest. 

“Calm down. You’re all flushed and we haven’t even gotten to the good part yet.” I try to control my breathing. 

Feel his cock rest outside my hole and he pushes in slightly, but it feels so deep already. “Ohhhhh ahh,” I moan. He rubs my tummy waiting for me to calm down a bit. I want more. I buck my hips up signaling for him to continue. 

He pushes the rest of the way and it hurts so much. Feels as if I’m being split open. Shit. Try and ride out the pain. Brian starts to thrust in and out of me slowly. And after a while, the pain starts to subside. The intense feeling of his cock raking up against my prostrate is all I can feel now. 

I smile up at him and he leans down and swooshes his mouth against mine sucking on my tongue and I pant into his mouth. Fuck. This is incredible. 

He angles his hips and starts pushing in and out faster. “You like the feel of that?” he says. 

“Ah…fuck…yeah.” I scream out the ‘yeah’ and his lips dart out between his lips. 

“You’re so… fucking tight. You feel… incredible Justin,” he says. His voice sounds sultry. I arch my hips to meet his thrusts. 

He reaches between us and takes my cock into his hand. He jerks me off fast and I can feel my balls rising up. Only a matter of time before I…

“Want you to…come with me. You gonna come with me?” He speeds up his thrusts and I milk the muscles of my ass around his cock. 

“Ohhh…shit,” I moan as the come spurts from my slit and spills into his hand. A few seconds later, he’s coming with a full force. 

He flops down resting his full weight on my body and I feel his hot breath against my neck. He lifts his head and tells me I’m beautiful. “So are you,” I tell him. He reaches for the ring of the condom and removes it. I groan missing him inside of me. 

He lifts off of me and lies down beside me. He doesn’t say anything, only breathes in and out, in and out. 

“So, was I okay?” 

“Okay? You were more than okay. You were amazing, hot, incredible, and sexy. Want me to go on?” He laughs and hearing him makes me want to melt. 

I match his laugh and say, “Thanks. I tried to be good for you.” 

He rubs his hand over my chest and tweaks my nipple. “You don’t have to try so hard.” 

“Okay,” I say. “So what happens now?” I lace my fingers through his. I want to know if there will be more, more than just sex between us. 

“Well now, we’ll probably fuck again. And then we’ll take a rest, and then go at it again.” He gives me a kiss on the side of my face. 

“I mean, after that. Will we be boyfriends or?” I want him to say yes, yes, yes. I want it all. 

He looks up at the ceiling and sighs. “Justin. I thought we were just having fun here. Let’s not rush things alright?” He turns to smile at me but I feel crestfallen. 

Suddenly, the idea of a round two doesn’t sound as appealing as it was a few moments ago. I let go of his hand and roll over onto my side. Don’t want him to see the look of disappointment I now have. 

“Hey, what’s the matter?” he says with concern in his voice and brings his hand to my shoulder. 

“Um…nothing. I have to get dressed for class or else I’ll be late.” I get out of bed and head to the bathroom to take a piss. I shouldn’t feel bad that all he wants is to have fun with me. I’m lucky enough to have experienced sex for the first time with such a breathtakingly gorgeous man. Shouldn’t expect anything more, I guess. I flush the toilet and walk back into the bedroom to find Brian stroking his cock waiting for me. 

“Come over here,” he says. His cheeks are a bit flushed just like mine and I try not to look at his hardening member, but fail miserably. 

I pad over to him. “I need to get ready. I can’t be late or…” He crushes his lips against mine and demands entry inside. I allow him and after a heated make-out session, he says, “How about a quickie before class?” I nod my head. I want him to fuck me, but I want to punch him too. Scream at him for wanting to only have sex with me, and nothing more. But this will have to be enough for now. That’s the last thought I have before I feel his dick at my hole.


	5. Taking A Chance

author's note: This is now two months later. I decided to speed up time a bit. Also, if my writing style seems a bit different from previous chapters, it's because I'm new at writing so I'm still experimenting with what I feel comfortable in terms of style, etc.

* * *

Justin’s POV 

 

It’s a Wednesday afternoon and Brian called a little while ago to tell me he’s running a few minutes late. I sit in bed and fine-tune the finishing touches of him in my sketchpad. He’s inspired me. It’s been a while since I’ve felt the urge, the desire to pick up a pencil and paper. But he’s too beautiful not to draw. 

About thirty minutes later, I hear a knock on the door. I press my lips up against his as we make our way over to the bed. That’s the one place we seem to spend the majority of our time together. But I don’t complain. We get comfortable resting ourselves against the fluffy down pillows. He hands me a Snickers bar. A smile escapes my lips soaking in the gesture. I remember the first time he came over to my place and stuck the very same chocolate in the palm of my hand. 

“What have you been to Taylor?” He inches his way toward my body and rests his hand on my cock. I can immediately feel myself growing hard. 

After fucking for the past two months, he still has the ability to make me blush. 

“Just drawing,” I say softly. He raises an eyebrow. 

“Show me. I want to see.”

“Ah…it’s not very good.” Feel the heat rising up my neck and blotting my cheeks. 

“Hmm, I think you’re just shy. That’s why you’re blushing. Come on Justin.” He gives me a serious look. The shrug of my shoulders is an indication that he’s been granted permission to look. 

Brian’s eyed are glued to the piece of paper and I wait for what seems like hours for him to say something. And when he opens his mouth, I suck in a breath. “This is good Justin. Well, it’s better than good. I’m actually a little shocked. You drawing me naked!” His mouth is gaping open pretending to be shocked. 

He goes on. “That’s pretty naughty especially for you. Tell me something. Did you get hard when you were drawing me? He strokes me through the confines of my jeans and I let out a gasp. He trails kisses along my neck. 

“Yes…yeah I do.” My heart starts to beat a little faster. I’m always hard for him. He knows it. 

“Mm, you taste salty,” he whispers against my Adam’s apple. I try and help him out of his clothes, but he beats me to it. 

His fingers disappear underneath my shirt and he gently massages the skin. “I can never get enough of your skin. So fucking soft,” he murmurs. 

He rips open my shirt and the buttons go flying everywhere. 

“You owe me a new shirt asshole.” I giggle and his eyes glaze over with lust. 

“Oh, look who’s become feisty all of a sudden. I like that. It’s hot. You’re hot.” He licks his way down the center of my chest and rubs my nipples until they’re hard pointy nubs. He swirls his tongue over my right nipple and sucks on it. 

Brian wrestles me out of my jeans and gives me a smirk. “No underwear,” he says quietly to himself. He runs his hand through my tuft of blond pubes and buries his noise against the hair, breathing in my smell. 

He licks around the swollen head and I rub my hands over my face. The intensity of his tongue and lips cause me to bite down on my thumb. Hard. He takes me into my mouth and my response is to grip the sheets. Tight. He takes me farther down his throat and I let out a ‘fuck.’ 

He grabs the back of my legs bringing my body closer to his. I feel so connected to him. He hums around my cock and takes my balls, rolling them between his strong hands examining their fullness.

“Fuck, oh fuck Brian. More, more, more, more, more,” I pant out starting to see stars in the back of my eyes. 

I’m twisting my head from side to side as he flips his tongue on the underside of my cock and I let out a loud moan. Brian told me he likes it when I’m vocal during sex. He encourages it. At first, I would bite the sheets to suppress my cries of pleasure. But he told me to stop doing that. He insists that I make as much noise as I want. It turns him on. 

“Oh fuck Brian. I…I’m…come coming.” My orgasm erupts and he takes it down his throat, swallowing every last drop. 

He releases my cock and leans over and plants a kiss on my mouth. “Open up,” he says in a low voice. I taste my come as he swishes his tongue around inside of me. Feels naughty and kinky and hot. Love that about him, about us. 

We break away from the kiss and glance down to find him in a semi-erect state. 

“Now it’s your turn,” I whisper while leaving delicate kisses over his eyelids, the bridge of his nose, his mouth. 

“Hmm, in a little while. Let’s talk,” he says as he adjusts his pillow trying to get comfortable. 

His arm rests across my chest and I sense he’s in one of his weird moods because he’d rather talk than have sex. 

“Why are you with me?” His eyes are focused on me as he watches, waits for my response. 

His question catches me off guard and I swallow a breath. “Um, I like being with you Brian. You know that. Why would you ask me that?”

“Don’t you ever want more?” He glances up at the ceiling and blinks. “We’ve been seeing one another for a couple months and I’ve never once asked you to the movies, or to a restaurant with candlelight and expensive tablecloth. I look at you and sometimes I think I don’t give you enough. But you don’t say anything, so I just file that thought away. But then, it comes back.” 

“I’ve never asked you for anything Brian.” 

“Well…maybe that’s the problem. You don’t fool me. That first night we had sex.” He lets the words float in the air. 

“Wh…what about it?” My heart skips a beat. 

“Will we be boyfriends? That’s what you said. I told you that we were just having fun. And I saw your reaction. I pretended not to notice, but. And after all this time, you’ve waited for me. Waited for me to declare us boyfriends. I bet, while I was fucking you that first time, you thought you were in love with me.”

I can only look at him. I’m speechless. I…

“I’m right aren’t I?” His voice is high and unrecognizable. 

“Yeah you’re right except for one thing.” I spit that last part in his face. I’m suddenly angry with him for acting this way. 

“And what would that be?” he blinks at me. His face seems cold, like stone, like winter, like nothing. 

“It was that first day we met. You told me I was beautiful.” I choke back a sob. “That’s when I fell for you.” Purse my lips together and fix my gaze on the folds of the bed sheet. 

“That’s fucked Justin. To tell you the truth, I wasn’t even planning on sticking around after that first time. I don't stick around. That's not who I am. And you deserve more than this. I have to go," he yells as he gets out of bed and throws on his shirt and jeans. I swear his eyes look watery, but he turns his head so I can’t be sure. 

“You don’t mean that, Brian. Why are you doing this?” I cry out as he walks away. 

His back is to me as he reaches the door. He hesitates, tilts his head, but stops. And the next moment, he slams the door. It feels like the end, the end of me, and the end of us. My heart stops beating for a second. It feels broken. I’m broken. 

He’s gone. Gone. Gone. Gone. I hug my knees to my chest and let the tears fall. I don’t even know what just happened. I have to replay the last few minutes again in my mind, but even then, I don’t know. But I do know I’m alone. Always alone. 

I find the sketch of Brian lying on my bed and smile for a brief second. I graze my fingertips lightly across the page. I pick it up, scrunch it in a ball, and throw it across the room. 

I can’t fucking move. I love him. I hate him. I love him. I fucking hate him. 

I mean, I thought there had been times when he cared for me. Really cared. Think back to the caress of his hand on my cheek, the glimmer in his eyes. Maybe he had me fooled. Wish I had never met him. For a moment, I think I could forgive him for what he said. But I shouldn’t. Images of make-up sex float in my mind. I quickly shake them away.

An hour later, I’m startled out of my zombie state when the phone rings. My caller I.D. displays Kinney Brian. What the fuck is his problem? I ignore it. But then a few minutes later, it rings again. Unplug the phone and decide to get some sleep. He can fuck himself. I hope I don’t dream of him, but I will. I always do. Bastard.


	6. Taking A Chance

Justin’s POV 

It’s been three days since I’ve seen him. Three days of jerking off to him before going to bed. Three days of ignoring his constant phone calls. Three days of feeling shattered. Now I know why they call it a broken heart. When I woke up and found the picture I’d drawn of him mashed into a ball, I couldn’t throw it away. It would feel final, like I was closing the book on us. Maybe he’s already done that, but not me. Not yet. Not now. 

Emmett tracked me down earlier, insisting that I come and watch this unknown rock band that’s playing on campus. He said the drummer was hot. Aren’t all drummers hot? They have that sexy, dangerous, enticing look about them. He wanted to grab a smoothie beforehand. So here I am sitting with him in the food court pretending to follow along with every word he utters. Every couple of minutes I nod my head, or say ‘ah ha.’ It’s too hard to focus on anything other than the pain in my chest, and the memories of us.

“Honey, have you listened to anything I’ve said in the past ten minutes?” 

“Um yeah. You were talking about…what were you talking about? Sorry.” I bite my lip and study his expression. 

“Hmm, I think someone is preoccupied.” He rests his palms on the white plastic table and stares into my eyes. 

“I’m just busy Emmett. With school and…” I trail off, close my eyes, and wonder where he is at this exact moment. 

“And what?” He scrunches his eyebrows with a sudden interest. 

“Well, Brian and I sort of stopped seeing each other.” Saying the words out loud makes it seem too real, too official. 

“Oh no. What happened sweetie? I haven’t spoken to Brian in a few days. When did this happen?” 

I shrug my shoulders and look down at the floor. “Three days ago. I don’t really want to talk about it. We’re just over I guess. I mean, we weren’t really together to begin with. I thought we were. Maybe we were. I don’t know. We were smiling and he brought me chocolate like the first time. But then, he said something about never planning on sticking around. He said I deserve more, that I should want more.” 

I glance up at him and blush realizing that I’ve revealed almost everything that happened. But telling a friend is easier than having these thoughts float around in your mind especially when you don’t know what to do with them.

Emmett takes his hand and rests it upon mine. He rubs it and somehow that soothes me. I feel grateful to call him my friend. 

He takes his napkin and blots the corner of his eyes. “I’m so sorry baby. What can I do for you? Tell me what I can do.” 

I want to tell Emmett to make the pain go away. But he can’t. “There’s nothing really to do. But thanks for listening anyway.” I manage to bring a slight smile to my face showing my appreciation. 

“Of course sweetie. That’s what friends are for.” He goes back to sipping on his banana strawberry smoothie and he smirks around the straw.

“I have an idea,” he says. “How about we show Brian what a fool he is for leaving you. We should make him jealous. Well, that’s what I did with an old flame. We had been seeing each other for a little while and we got into this nasty fight. Well, I went to this hot gay dance club close to here. It was a Friday night so I knew he was going to be there. And he spotted me. I found this tasty little morsel, started grinding against him, and he was so jealous.” He laughs at the memory. “He came through the crowd, pushed the morsel away, and gave me this long passionate kiss. Then we went back to his place and fucked like bunnies. But the point is, he realized that he needed me, wanted me.” 

“So I should show him what he's missing huh?” I suck in my bottom lip actually considering it. 

“Exactly,” he says tapping his fingers on the table. Up and down, back and forth. 

“I don’t know about that. I’m still mad at him. He's moved on I'm sure. He’s not missing much. I’m just me.” I recall thinking those exact words not too long ago. Guess I still have my insecurities. 

“Honey, don’t be modest. You’re gorgeous. Every gay man’s wet dream. You’re beautiful inside and out.” He smiles at me genuinely and I laugh sheepishly. 

“Thanks.” 

As we walk over to the Jammin Café, I mentally peruse Emmett’s idea. It’s not very original. However, the thought of making Brian jealous does have a certain appeal. 

Watching the lead singer in his tight leather pants captivate the audience with his long lean body and slight turn of the hip makes me think. I want to be like him. I admire him. He’s sexy and brave. He reminds me of Brian. I chant his name in my head over and over and over. Brian. Brian. Brian. God I love him. Miss him. He has no idea. Shut my eyes and let the music take over. 

When I get home, I climb into the shower hoping to wash away my thoughts. Wash away him even if it’s only for a few brief moments. Lean my head up against the tile and let out a yawn. I haven’t exactly been able to sleep these last few days. 

As I make my way out of the bathroom, the phone rings. I don’t have to look at the caller I.D, to know it’s Brian. I just need to hear his voice. I give in. 

“Hello,” I breathe into the phone waiting for him. 

“Justin.” 

“Why…what do you want?” 

“To hear your voice,” he rushes out. He sounds nervous. 

Breathe in and out, in and out. “I can’t Brian. I…” Don’t know what to say. 

“Let me see you. Can I come over?” There’s desperation in his voice but I can’t, I won’t. 

I lie in bed and unwrap the towel from around my waist. Let my fingers dance around my stomach imagining it’s his long fingers tickling me. 

“I don’t think so Brian.” I lick a digit and run it around my right nipple. His mouth on it, sucking it, fucking it with his tongue. 

“What are you doing?” He’s curious; he probably knows what I’m up to. 

“Ah, nothing,” I lie. I run my hand over this sensitive spot on my hipbone. It’s this tiny area right by a freckle. Remember him licking it and groaning loudly at the sensation. That’s just one of my oversensitive spots where the simple touch can send warm tingles through my entire body. 

“Then why are you breathing so hard?” His voice comes back. Picture him naked in bed just like me. Touching himself. Wishing I was there. 

“I…I’m doing sit-ups.” I lie. 

“Liar,” he says with a slight chuckle. My fingers find their way down to my hard cock. Rub the head with my thumb while his cherry red lips creep into my mind. 

“I think you’re touching yourself Justin. You miss me don’t you? I fucking miss you. I’m sorry for yelling at you the other day. I shouldn’t have done that.” He sighs and my cock grows harder after hearing him admit to missing me. 

“I didn’t know it would be so hard. Are you still there?” he wonders since I’ve remained silent. Just been repeating his words over and over. 

“Yeah, I’m still here. Wait, what would be so hard?” God knows I’m hard. 

“Missing somebody. Missing you,” he says. I run my hand up my shaft. Close my eyes thread my fingers through his auburn hair. Watch his lips bob up and down. Rubbing his hands along my thigh. 

“Justin you’re groaning. I knew it. You’re jerking off to me aren’t you?” 

"No…I’m not,” I pant out. “Not you. This hot singer I saw tonight. He was wearing these tight leather pants.” 

There’s complete silence for a few seconds. “Oh.” That one syllable was enough to let me know he’s jealous. For a split second, I consider torturing him further, but…

“I made it up ok. There’s no hot guy. Well he does exist, but I’m not fantasizing about him. Only you,” I say slowly letting him know that no one can get me hard the way he can. 

“Fuck. You really had me going for a second.”

“Were you jealous?” I continue my ministrations picking up the pace a little. 

“Maybe,” he whispers. 

“Hmm, I miss you.” My cock pulses underneath my fingers. 

“I wanna be inside of you. That’s what I’m thinking,” Brian tells me. “Wish I was there touching you.” I speed up the strokes and feel pre-cum leaking out onto my hand. 

“Oh, god.” Start pumping faster and faster. Run my lips over the back of my other hand. 

“Are you close? You feel my hands pulling on your hair, my dick sliding in and out of you. You feel that?” His voice is low and I hear him groan. Know he’s jerking off along with me. 

“Uh, yeah…yeah.” After a couple more tugs my balls begin to rise. Wish it would last a little longer. Don’t want to stop hearing his voice. 

“Ah oh fuck oh god,” I scream into the phone as the come spills into my hand. 

Shortly after I hear him moan into my ear and my now softened dick is beginning to stir once again. But I ignore it. 

“Not nearly as good as the real thing huh?” 

“No.” I let out a breath. 

“I need to see you,” he pleads. 

“Well, you’ll see me tomorrow in class.” Even though my heart is telling me to forgive him, my mind is saying no. I can’t just let him off the hook. Not tonight as least. I also know that what Brian said the other night meant something. Can't just sweep that under the rug. 

Feel the exhaustion taking over me anyway. “I’m gonna go to sleep,” I yawn out. 

“Oh um okay. Well, I…goodnight Justin.” 

“Night,” I say. 

After I hang up on him, I clean my face and brush my teeth. I’m mentally preparing for tomorrow. Playing out different scenarios in my head. The ball is in my court. I hold the cards. It’s up to me to decide our fate.


End file.
